My point of view on the Pride Charm.
It’s great this was added. I put it on my David and Felix immediately. It’s no secret here, or on other social media that the charm has been very divisive. Some people have shown what the bowels of society still look like.
And good gravy it’s 2021 for goodness sake.
Anyway, that’s not what I want to talk about. There’s already too many posts about that.
I want to talk Victim Mentality.
My fellow DBD LGBTIQ (or anything else you identify as) brothers and sisters, it’s time to develop some mental fortitude, and understand that just because you display the Pride Charm, not everything that may occur to you within a match that you personally do not like is a blatant act of homophobia.
I won’t dispute that those will occur. They were occurring before the advent of the Pride Charm in this game. Just like targeted racism in the game. But my point is that the perception of how often this occurs is actually far less than the reality.
Please don’t be that person that abuses the reporting system without actual, clear, indisputable evidence that another player was indeed blatantly homophobic.
Victim Mentality can be just as damaging as homophobia (or other types of genuine discrimination). In fact it can actually be abused to be horribly manipulative, and ruin the lives of well meaning people that either simply made an ignorant mistake, or did or said something that had absolutely zero to do with a persons sexuality/race/disability (whatever), but the person in question invents their own narrative that it was one of those forms of discrimination. I’ve seen this happen in real life: people throwing around the homophobia accusation at others simply to get what they want. It’s shameful and embarrassing.
All i’m saying is be better. Don’t wear the Pride Charm in game, and allow yourself to fall into the trap of thinking that every tunnel, every camp, every flashlight clicky clicky, every t bag is because of the Pride Charm you’re displaying.
Comments
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Fully agreed.
sadly there are bad apples in every community..
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Yes, I agree totally with what you said. That last line was especially well said, bravo.
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Best take on the situation so far.
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Thank you. Like @Mooks said, there’s bad apples in every community.
Homophobia is bad.
Unfounded accusations of homophobia is just as bad.
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This is all true. There are already people blaming everything that happens to them because of the pride charm. In some cases, it might be, but camping and tunneling is a normal thing. I am getting a little tired of people blaming it all on wearing the charm.
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The problem is that not only does this exist, it gets used to justify actual bigotry in turn. In fact, I'd say that victimised people get accused of trying to manipulate others far more than people pretend to be victimised.
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Well, I don't think this is a topic you should talk about if you don't fully understand it. And, as someone who is not a member of the community, I don't fully understand.
I will, however, say that from an outside point of view, what you are talking about seems to be accurate. There will be bad apples in every community, and it is important to know how to deal with them.
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I can’t argue against that either.
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While true, it still helps to keep all reported cases of bad behavior genuine, as it will ensure that all cases are treated seriously. I'm also NOT saying you don't know that or intended to say otherwise, just piping up for everyone elses sake.
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That is fair. As a person who is not LGBTQ I do not fully understand what actually goes on, with the people in that community.
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That is a commendable effort, but I'm fairly certain that the chat logs are the only thing the Devs go off of in terms of bigotry given what can happen in game, unless it's extremely blatant with video evidence (which is very hard to come by where charms are concerned, I don't even know how that would work).
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Victim blaming before its even happened. Nice.
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I'm sorry, but no 'false accusations of homophobia' aren't worse than homophobia. Let's not act like they are, okay? People have been killed because of their sexuality, tortured through conversion therapy because of their identity, and so much more. You can call out people who make false accusations without equating the two. The other is NOT just as bad by any means.
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Well, that's also something the players will simply have to contend with. If they think someone is targeting them for their charm but have NO evidence of it, then was it even the charm in the first place?
People are going to have to look at why they feel they are targeted in those scenarios, and either pinpoint the action that made them feel targeted for a specific reason or realize that maybe they are placing blame where there is none. We cannot and should not assign blame based on gut feelings, and should always look logically at the information in front of us.
I personally have... issues, where I think everyone is trash-talking me at all times. My only method of dealing with this is to put my logic in charge and suspend my emotions while I figure things out so I don't assign guilt or blame where there is none, because my gut feeling is simply not something I can trust. This same mentality is going to be vital for making proper reports against bigotry, as the only way to keep reports genuine is to be able to logically point out where bigotry is being showcased, and not get overrun with emotion that may just be bleed-over from other events. I'm not blaming anyone for having those emotions, not in the slightest, but everyone will definitely have to be able to assess a scenario as its own thing in order to properly determine what is going on.
As for gameplay showing bad behavior, I can think of a few scenarios that would, in the very least, show good faith concern for bad behavior. If the charm is singled out and the Killer blatantly interacts with the other Survivors in a friendly manner, that would be a good faith concern that the Killer was singling out the one player with the charm. While it might not lead to a ban, it would likely note that player as having conducted such behavior, and build a case against them. When I worked on indie online games, mods, etc, almost all players that were reported had a report file on them with descriptions of what they were reported for, as well as the evidence. This let us build a much more complete idea of who was behind the keyboard and what they were about. I wouldn't doubt that DBD has the same thing.
Maybe I'm out of my depth here, I dunno.
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Intentional false accusation of homophobia actually make real homophobia seem less severe than it actually is.
But you can’t really compare or weigh homophobia on its own with false accusations, so saying they are equally bad or one is worse than the other doesn’t really work at all.
Post edited by Mooks on11 -
As someone who is gay I fully agree with this message. Thank you @TheClownIsKing for being thoughtful and for being an ally
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This...This fact, I have learned that, in a very terrible way
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When someone treats you badly in the game or in life, in most cases, it's not possible to be 100% sure why. Part of what sucks about being in a marginalized group is that the specter of discrimination is always in the room, and you can rarely be completely sure it's not affecting what happens. I don't think the onus is on the marginalized person to decide that they shouldn't be so paranoid -- I think the onus is on society to stop giving that person reasons to worry that there's a bias against them. Until we have equality, people are going to be justified in suspecting that they're not being treated as equals.
Rather than telling people to stop blaming others for something they didn't do, I think it's more helpful to admit that we don't know if they did it, and usually we can't know, and that feeling is the really uncomfortable product of living in a culture where people are discriminated against pretty often.
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While you are mostly right there is harassment because of the charm, in fact I just had someone that seemed nice sent me a steam invite after a game just to say to me a lot of homophobic remarks because I was using the pride charm.. it feels horrible but I guess is my fault in part for accepting an invitation after the game. It doesn't have to be only in game but it can be because of it, people will always find ways to harass others without consequences.
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Yeah my thoughts are it's almost not worth having things like this because it brings out the worst in people. Its not the fault of those wearing it or it existing, it just shows the bad side of others. It's sort of like bringing real life problems into your escape from reality. I don't want to know that the guy I'm playing against is a raging homophobe.
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I’ve seen other posts dealing with this issue or people saying it should not be in the game my response is this.
it don’t matter if your part of LGBTIQ community or anything else if your in my game I will treat you like I treat any other survivor if your a jerk in game I’m camping and tunnelling you teabag expect it back (I like using ghostface) and if you play well and don’t rely on one loop the entire game expect a gg msg or a question why you did something stupid I also have friends that are apart of the community and there just normal people that want to be treated normally hence what I’ve said above long comment short I don’t give a beep if you got the pride charm or not your gonna die or escape simple as that
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My take. Just play fair with everyone and move along.
To be fair, I wouldn't even notice a pride charm on a survivor (to small), I'd be looking for the closet hook or next target.
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