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How do you grow thicker skin (as killer)?
I main survivor and have ~1k hrs in and have always been in red rank. However my killer sucks absolute ass and especially when I play a weaker killer for daily or achievements, I sometimes get demolished by a team average rank 10.
It takes me extremely long to mentally prepare myself to queue for a killer match, and when I do get destroyed, I won't want to play in at least a few days. I feel utterly defeated when the survivors tbag me at the exit and type ez in the post game chat. I don't want to disable the chat tho- I love having interactions with other players.
I sometimes go afk and let myself derank for a bit to finally get myself together to play again, but as I inevitebly rank up, I run into very good (and toxic) players again that would humiliate me and make me question my existence.
So question for killer mains, how did you grow thicker skin and managed to stop caring about the match outcomes?
Comments
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So what you're saying is that it's easy to rank as killer so you need to go afk to derank to face weaker players?
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Don't base your self worth on how well you play a video game that has luck/RNG play a large factor in the outcome.
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Yes it's very easy to rank up, but that's definitely not where my skill level should be. If I get a full red rank team I would most likely get destroyed, which I always do.
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But I have so many hours in, guaranteed that I spend more time on this game than most players do. When someone loops me for an entire match they outright outskills me, and it's very hard to not get tilted from that. Video games are for entertainment, but I hardly get any thru losing games. But without losing games I can't get good, I'm stuck in this paradox now.
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Don't focus on winning, just focus on trying to improve your play, i.e. keeping chases short.
Just know that the matches which are stressful are the best ones where you will learn as you are probably playing against good survivors. Try and enjoy these matches as a learning experience rather than a stress fest.
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That seems like good advice! I even dodge lobbies where survivors have fancy skins (the better they look they more anxious I get LOL)
Pathetic I know, but I'm hoping for a change in mentality. Maybe going perkless as you suggested would help.
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+1 to both of these. I also started playing perkless for 2 reasons, 1 it almost gives you an excuse for your loss, so you don't feel as frustrated when you do, you were basically expecting to lose. Also it can help improve your game sense being forced to not rely on perks.
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That makes sense! But I assume there would be frustrated times like "I would've gotten this if I had x perk" as well? lol
Nonetheless I'll give a try! Thank you :)
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This. If your going for your daily then that's your objective , don't worry about kills. If your looped for a whole game....well thats kinda on you. Learn when to break it off. loopers ALWAYS come back. T baggers at gate,? rancor and or noed. Doesn't always get them but feels good when it does.
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When you lose, be honest with yourself and try to identify what you did wrong in the match - trying to learn from loss instead of being annoyed by it is a good attitude to have imo. And just use that experience to improve next time.
Losing really doesn't matter and it happens to everybody. I wouldn't go in with expectations of winning every game.
And if someone's an ass post-game then that's on them, not you. You don't gain anything by engaging with those people - just gg and move on. But there will be plenty of times where you win/lose and yet everybody's chill and nice, those make it all worth it to me.
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Demi is a pretty good dbd youtuber. He also got a degree in psychology so he's got some good advice on how to have the right gamer mindset. Check out his survivor guide video. It has a small instance on what you should do if you know you're getting whooped and need to know how to handle it. At least... from what i can remember.
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Thicker skin and this game is hard but easiest way as killer is to play for points not kills or rank once I decided to do this I was all of a sudden highly-ranked and was getting high points and great results probably because I was less stressed.
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Understand it's a BS and unfair game with awful matchmaking and ranking.
Once you get that and stop caring about winning and just focus on enjoying the game you'll have a better time.
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Revenge is a dish best served cold. You just take your lumps and work towards where you will be giving them the 4K over and over again. Besides, ask yourself if you really care what some faceless squawking moron on the internet chats at you? Do not subjugate yourself to the demons of "external validation" and you will be just fine.
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Always close lobby chat.
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The big thing is to not particularly care about what your opponents think. Play the game and if they act like ######### in chat screw around with them.
I do things like sing backstreetboys songs, ask "lol what?" Over and over and other such things. It makes their comments quite a lot funnier and reduces anxiety because you will realize quickly its not someone worthwhile passing judgment but a child, or at least someone acting as one, screaming because they lost or gloating because they won.
Just don't say anything legit offensive and your golden. Not only because it's wrong, but they want you to do it to validate their behaviour. They need to feel like the hero or the victim. Someone prattling on about meatloaf recipes doesn't really do either.
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Imagine that survivors are bots. Don't think about 4k, use other goals. Is a survivor t-bagging? Nod them. If you don't want to close chat, but you get toxic chat, use sarcasm or words "gg, have a nice day".
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First play a killer you enjoy if your playing g something that annoys you ignoring the hate /salt post game chat wont be easy
Then if your still mad just say gg leave if it's not and leave then you can scream into a pillow or something
And swap between survivor and killer only killer may drive you crazy those 3 things will help a lot every thing else will have to be your decisions
Ohh and dont over think what the survivors are gonna say until you get there most of the time they will just leave or say gg same as you
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Do what you can but don't give up.
I might not be a killer main but play both sides around the same amount.
Sometimes I get destroyed too but I don't give up and I continue to play killer.
Why?
If i stopped every time after a defeat I wouldn't learn anything, I'd go into same miste over and over again.
Try different set of perks or add ons, learn what works and what not.
If they get the gates open and all survivors are there than just don't go there
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Are you serious this person is asking for legit help so they dont break something and that's your response I'm more disappointed in people now than when behavior had the Halloween event
And For all you know they could have anger issues and if that's the case they should probably stick to survivor
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I'm gonna be honest, I didn't. Losing multiple games tilts me even with 1.9k hours.
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Biggest pieces of advice I can give are...
- Don't let yourself get pulled into an endgame chat where someone is trying to bash you. I've had plenty of pleasant chats with people, but if someone is just trying to get under your skin and insult you...just leave after saying GGWP.
- Learn how to spot when your getting heated. Often times getting pissed off is only going to lead to more mistakes that is gonna piss you off even more. Take a moment to take a deep breath if you need it. I've had times where I've done this mid-game even and just took my hands off the keyboard for afew seconds to find my zen. You'd be surprised how quickly a game where I was losing can quickly turn around into a win. If your heated AFTER a game, maybe take a few minutes to watch some youtube or something before coming back.
- Accept that there is things that you CAN do to improve. Too many people for some reason have a tendency of assuming they play perfect and the game is therefore unfair when they lose. I had plenty of games early on when I too perfectly held W and chased after the survivor perfectly utilizing the exact pathing they went through... until I found out that this ISNT the best move, lol. You're going to learn tricks on how to play better and accepting that what your currently doing ISNT perfect and theres room to grow is actually a pretty good thing.
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This tip can go to any game, be calm and stay focused. Especially in a game like DbD theres a lot that you need to pay attention and you need to take mental notes constantly. Id recommend recording some of your games and reviewing the ones you did poorly in and try to identify at least 5 mistakes. Then go into your next match and keep in mind those mistakes so you dont make them again. Soon enough youll become a much better player and you wont need to keep so many mental notes, itll just come naturaly
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Set a goal for yourself, a personal win condition. It doesn't have to be 4 kills or even 1 kill. Look at legion, she doesn't have to kill anyone to get a good score.
Maybe you can go in and make it a simple personal goal. Like getting two down at the same time. Having one chase last less than 30 seconds. Getting at least two people to struggle.
That way you can always leave a game saying "hey I could have done better but I did exactly what I came for."
Accept that they're being toxic, but hey if you won in your own way who cares about them being little shits.
If you can't reach your personal goal that's fine too. You can never win every game and you'll get better next time. Hell feel free to make a new "I won" goal in the middle of the game. The point is to have fun. Whatever that means to you.
Best of luck!
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Less soy, more Testosterone. Get a Duke Nukem soundboard open while you play.
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Just keep playing survivor and forget about the killer role/dailies. There's a reason why survivors have long queues.
Killer is frustrating af and some survivors will take every chance to make the killer feel miserable.
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Its a video game. As soon as I stop playing my day will be exactly the same as it was before I started playing.
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I've watched that video and the "mindset" advice he gives isn't very good. If you don't care then you wouldn't be playing the game. You wouldn't be trying to play well either. So the whole "don't take it seriously"/"don't care" mindset basically in reality surmounts to "don't play the game" because actually playing it, particularly trying to play it well, is taking it seriously and caring about the game.
Having a degree does not make you an authority of something nor does it make you "correct" so I'm not sure why that was even cited when all he gave was reddit-tier tips
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I didn't say that i was correct. It's just how i play. I just don't wanna break my controller over getting tunneled.
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Honestly I go in with my own goals. If I'm trying to get better at nurse or a particular killer I know I'm going to play like garbage so I don't let taunts or anything bother me. Also just be nice in end game chat.
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I wasn't referring to you being correct, but what you stated. I just don't really get the whole "don't care/don't take it seriously" advice. If you didn't care, you wouldn't be playing. If you don't take it seriously, then you wouldn't be playing well. And at that point you'd have to ask the question why play if you take it neither seriously nor care about it.
For example, I do not like Game of Thrones. Watched one episode of it and found it to be a drag and have not given a ######### about it since. I do not care about it and subsequently I do not engage with it.
The advice that should be given is don't take the game personally, such as when you get tunnelled/facecamped whatever. Otherwise playing the game by default makes you care, and trying to play well--even to a degree of mastery where you can do it by muscle memory with a lot less effort--is still taking it seriously
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Isn't he a survivor main? I've only ever seen content from him playing as survivor. Not being funny but the mindset required for Killer and Survivor are quite different. Sure survivor can be stressful at times, especially against a good Killer, but playing Killer is low key stressful at all times, even against a team that's not decent
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Yeah it's just a game, I used to get really mad if a killer slaughtered me, and I mean swearing off the game mad. I've stopped doing that because it's not worth it.
when I play killer I get stomped a lot because it's not my main. the survivor tbagging is annoying and meant to upset killers. unfortunately the devs don't care or see it that way, they even keep stats on it.
I don't worry about endgame chat anymore, ya sometimes I do have awesome interactions with people but 99% of the time it's trash talk and not worth it.
as for the exit gate thing, just don't go over there you know they're going to be tbagging at an exit gate just don't give them the satisfaction of going over there. you'll be surprised how long survivors will wait just to get a chance to do it. just go break doors and get other points if you can.
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It just really be like that, eventually you'll get better and can enjoy the absolute amount of salt. Their bitterness will feed and toughen you
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I'm a survivor main, but I had a similar experience for a long time playing this game. After awhile I started setting goals for myself. They started small. Don't get me wrong. My ultimate goal is always to escape, but I started with things like learning to loop more effectively, learning map layouts, or whatever things I thought would help me in the long run. As time went by I started achieving the individual goals I started adding to them, or combining 2 or more in one match. Eventually I noticed I was getting better. For me though it was much easier to have smaller goals and gain the satisfaction of reaching them along the way. Take that for what it's worth. Might not work for everyone, but for me it helped to have smaller goals along the way.
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It took me sometime but I can now play stressless since I play for fun while striving to get better without feeling disheartened at a loss. A few tips:
- Stop doing daily quests and achievements. Doing these will force you to play a certain killer or force a certain playstyle to get it, since you aren't comfortable with the killer role you shouldn't be doing challenges at all.
- Killer will take more strategic play than survivor since you play by yourself that's why it can be more stressful. Start with learning a basic M1 killer; once you learn this your skill will carry over to a lot of other killers. I learned the basics with wraith.
- Stick with one killer! Every killer is different pick one and master him.
- Watch some guides on youtube about looping. Keep in mind that you want to deny fast vaults. Usually you loop tiles counter clockwise.
- Ingame BM>don't react to t-baggers and flashlight clickers they just lose distance while doing it so it's actually good for the killer.
- Record your matches and rewatch to see where something went wrong or why you won so you get better faster.
- It takes time to be a great killer either you stop the torture of playing sometimes and stick to survivor or you commit and push through to get skillful. Days without killer gameplay really messes with building muscle memory and makes learning harder.
- Salty endgame? ignore or send: <3 gg. Killer queue is like 5 sec I just move on.
Edit: Also keep in mind that you shouldn't be able to win against experienced survivors while being new to killer. Your opponents could have >1000 hours into survivor while you only have 0-100 hours on killer. It's not evenly matched and you should only expect to learn a bit more about killer gameplay not a win. A better mindset is all about expectations.
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First, realize that this is a ######### video game and means absolutely nothing more than you allow it.
Second, turn off chat and don't worry about it if it bothers you.
Third, once the survivors have the gate, leave. Move somewhere that if they come to you you'll have a chance at downing them again. Stay away
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I do this too, especially Dwights with the elf bottoms and dweard head, that combo is excessively toxic so so consistently!! Also prestige Lauries, I ######### hate Laurie players. Like sorry but I'm severely prejudiced against Laurie players. They're the worst.
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That’s what i was trying to say. I just used the wrong words. Don’t take it personal or anything.
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He plays both sides. You just don’t watch the videos he does on new killers.
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Speaking from my own experiences, playing DotA 1 + 2, Overwatch and DBD.
If you rage or get frustrated, because you think your team is at fault or the game mechanics are unfair, you always will fight an uphill battle. In other games with an actual MMR system, you will never get to the point, where you can steamroll your opponetns, because they are in the same skill bracket as you. Only with a smurf account and playing against less experienced players will net you a higher win rate.
If you feel humiliated and your mood changes to the negative for the rest of the day, it's time to stop these kind of competetive games for good. I feel / felt that way, it does no good. Nobody in the world cares, if you are rank 1 in dbd or have 7000k mmr in Dota 2.
Just treat yourself right and play something that won't frustrate you to this negative point.
That's a good read: http://tortedelini.com/2019/05/09/why-i-dont-play-competitive-games-any-more/
Post edited by BaldursGate2 on0 -
Although I've never been hit that hard before, I have had my fair share of frustrating matches against toxic survivors and for me, I just have to remind myself that its just a game, and that most people aren't naturally talented (like me) and so we develop skill instead, which takes time and patience, hold strong friend, things will get better, but first you have to believe that things can change. Now with that being said, it's also extremely satisfying to teabag toxic survivors as ghost face and spam gg ez to anyone you kill. (i.e I'm joking please don't be toxic) But in all seriousness though, just focus on bringing what helps you have fun, like I play Legion because I find his stabs satisfying even though I'm probably better off playing as nurse for easy kills, just do what makes you happy. I hoped this help.
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I'm amazed by how positive and friendly this community can be, thank you everyone for your tips and have fun on all your killer games!
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Quote: "how did you grow thicker skin and managed to stop caring about the match outcomes?"
I still care about the outcome of the match and get upset when everything goes wrong even after all these years. However what helped me get a "more" chill mindset was specialisation.
Find a killer with a power you genuinely enjoy, then find a setup that boosts the factors you enjoy about said killer's power.
Once you've mastered the killer with your setup you will go in a match thinking that you can -to some extent- control the outcome of the match unless you face a team of 4 optimal solo players or a decent SWF team.
This may (or may not) help you enjoy the match more over time. Is there a killer you find considerably more interesting than other killers power-wise?
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Just ignore the stupid survivors.
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It's all about your state of mind man.
I know it's easier said than done, but, the answer is to stop caring so much. Be content with the little successes (As survivor: getting an unhook, some heals, a good loop or two / As Killer: making everyone bleed!) vs just "winning." Try to teach yourself to accept that this is just a game, that people are going to play how they want to play, they're going to be douchebags from time to time, and they may talk sh** and send you hatemail. You've got to try and learn to just not care, and when you can manage that, you'll find you're able to laugh off just about anything (not just in the game but in life as well), and you'll be happier, nearly stress free, and having fun.
It can take a lot of practice to train your mind to this point, years even, but it's worth it once you get there. Even if it takes you, say, 10 years of practice (highly unlikely, but just as a very extreme example), isn't that investment worth it to be stress free the rest of your life? The answer seems pretty obvious to me...
Anyone who is prone to taking things too seriously in life is likely going to have a hard time truly enjoying anything in that life. Realistically, we all go through these stages of caring too much about a given thing, but at some point we realize it's a huge waste of energy to get so tilted over that thing, especially when doing so doesn't provide any sort of benefit to you.
The quicker one can learn to enjoy the little successes of the game vs letting the little annoyances totally ruin your night, the better off you'll be in-game and in life. This doesn't mean letting all negative stuff just float over you without response, it just means learning when it's appropriate and beneficial to respond, and when it's NOT appropriate or beneficial.
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Just gotta learn to not be such a salty player. It is a game, treat it that way.
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Honestly I just think it comes down to our own personalities and and mindsets towards any type of competitive situation. I do get frustrated when I get wrecked playing killer but I'm not really shaken about that? It just goes away by the time I'm on queue for the next match, It's just a game, there are lots of thing in world that are worth getting mad about, and a game (and seeing the survivors spam the crouch button) is not one of those.
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This is the wrong place to ask, everyone here cries and whines non stop. Better to ask people who have played the game long but still aren’t on this forum
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