Why do teammates get so defensive?
If I point out a teammate's flaws at the end of a round, they get so angry. For example, I just played a round where I was hooked and the killer was no where around me, all of us were still alive, and 1 was being chased, and 2 were on a generator nearby. I was second hooked, and I was just left on the hook to die while my 2 teammates were finishing the 3rd gen out of the 5 and they could have ran to get me since the killer was distracted on the other side of the map. No one escaped, and at the end of the match when I pointed this out to everyone asking why they didn't save me mid game, I was bombarded with messages such as, "Well, you shouldn't have been downed in the first place, making us save you!", or "You're a trash player anyway, you aren't worth saving!", and the old famous "Get good newb". Why do survivors never want to take criticism? This happens literally every time to me.
TL;DR, why do teammates get so defensive when you point out something they did wrong?
Comments
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People don't like to admit that what they did was a mistake, or that their selfishness cost anyone else but themselves.
I've been in many situations similar to yours and I cannot fathom the thinking behind it.
I sometimes feel so puzzled (especially if like you mentioned, it's two people nearby on a gen and killer is nowhere to be found) and I spectate to see how's the game going to end. 100% of the time, the survivors lose if one team member gets sacrificed early on.
I'd think they just don't know enough about the game (or don't care). They just want to do their objectives, get points and move on.
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It's just ego, try not to take it to heart. When people are pointed out anything they did objectively wrong, e.g. not rescuing someone on 2nd hook while the killer is distracted or rushing the unhook before the killer can leave, they'll get defensive because their ego won't allow them to admit that they ######### up.
In post game I'll take the side of the person who was slighted, like the other day I had a Nea on my team that decided to not ready up and waste everyone's time before last second swapping to a flashlight, obviously the killer tunneled her out. In post game she called out the killer for tunneling and when he said why he had she started in on the whole "trash killer" tirade I replied saying I didn't blame the killer for it since I would have done the same and that she decided to drag out the lobby time when everyone else was readied up. When I came to the killers defense she shut up immediately.
TLDR: Ego makes people think they're right and sometimes you just need a second voice saying "nah bro, you're wrong"
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It sometimes depends on the approach. People are so used to others blaming them or "coming" after them that they don't realize that others may just be curious or genuinely wanting to give advice. However, in your situation, it just seems like they were frustrated and immature, so don't take it personally. Some people let the game get to their heads and they don't understand when to take responsibility for a mistake.
Generally, I only give advice when I know it's a new player and they did something that really made me frustrated throughout the game because they didn't know better. I usually just approach it by either asking why they chose to do something or I ask if they would like some advice for future games. I've had some great interactions with fellow teammates teaching them a few tricks before hitting next.
I also give the killer advice sometimes when they are ranting in end game chat about how frustrating the killer is, especially when it's a killer I play often. I've given many people advice on how to play Artist in end game chat and they appreciated it because I validated their feelings and gave them something that they can work on.
Generally I try not to be accusatory unless the teammate did something that was borderline trolling to me or did something so stupid that it boggles me. I also generally don't talk to survivors about how they can improve if I was playing killer. Doesn't usually create for a great situation because they probably already feel bad about losing, so unless someone asks what can I do better. I just hit next.
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