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And Then It Finally Happened...

5+ years of experience, 3000+ hours of playtime, and hundreds of hours on this very forum coaching newer players and I'm finally cutting the cord. I've spent years trying to be a positive voice in this community and scoffing at players who quit for petty reasons and now here I am after months of consideration and re-consideration giving myself the same treatment.

DBD used to be a game that gave me immense amounts of joy (and occasional bouts of stress). Now it's the opposite. Playing for any amount of time exacerbates my anxiety disorder and it hasn't been fun for ages. I stopped having fun almost a year ago and it has taken me too many months to finally prove to myself that this game is simply not worth my health to continue playing.

For the record I play both roles equally (although I consider myself a killer main for that very reason), and playing both roles has become miserable. Playing mostly solo-Q survivor means I have to rely on my teammates - which is a Catch-22 as playing with bad teammates lowers my MMR, which leads me to play with even worse teammates who lower my MMR even further. My individual efforts are meaningless in the face of either super-sweaty killers or super-campy killers, which ultimately goes to prove that I wasn't really skilled anyways and that my opponent was just the superior hockey player.

Playing killer at a high skill level (and I consider myself a much better killer than I am a survivor) is its own unique form of Perdition as I feel like one of the few people left who is playing 'chill' and not giving in to the insane "I only play Nurse with range add-ons" meta. Those of you who play M1 killers with no regression perks like I do can probably relate to my misery. I can consistently mindgame and outplay survivors and it just doesn't matter because BHVR's increasingly horrific map design means they always have another pallet they can reach.

I've seen and read all the updates for the newest patch, but I don't see how these supposedly 'sweeping' changes to the meta are going to affect the game in any meaningful way. DBD will truly live and die by its map design, and every map that has been released over the past year (and then some) has been a complete travesty.

I'm totally open to re-installing DBD, but not until BHVR learns their lesson that this is not a competitive e-sports ready game. It's truly just a fun party game (with loads of RNG elements that leave it wildly imbalanced) that's only really fun when everyone comes together. MMR may not be the causation of this effect, but this new 'survival means everything' ranking system is certainly correlated to the new meta of misery.

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